Two weeks ago at this exact moment I was going to bed and hoping that I would not still be pregnant at breakfast.
I wasn't. And for the past two weeks we have been figuring out what life with two little boys looks like.
Eric gets enormous credit that things are as good as they are. No matter how late one sleeps, one does not wake up the next morning physically recovered from pregnancy and labor and Eric has picked up a lot of the slack while I have been recuperating. This in turn has helped me heal more quickly and I have been feeling pretty good.
We have been doing so well, in fact, that we may have gotten a little over-confident: today we went to IKEA, which everyone knows is the K2 of retail.
I carried Ethan in a wrap and Emerson rode in the cart. Things actually went remarkably well until the very end. In spite of taking shortcuts and being very focused, we spent longer than we had intended to wandering around IKEA and Ethan got hungry. This was fine - I am adept at nursing while walking, so that's what I was doing when Emerson tragically dumped his much-needed snack on the floor and then became very sad about it. We recovered and made our way to the check-out.
Because it was IKEA at any time of any day, the lines were epic. Among the impulse buys near the check-out was a huge bin of plush soccer balls. Emerson helped himself to a ball and then proceeded to make a break for the store exit. I, with baby to breast, tried to go after him ineffectively while Eric, trying to steer two unwieldy carts as the line moved up made frustrated noises directed at the carts, Emerson and me.
Emerson's escape route got cut off by two carts pulling out of the checkout and, because he couldn't think of anything better to do, he laid down on the floor in the fetal position, hugging the soccer ball.
"Don't we all want to do that right now?" one of the women next to us in line commented.
Indeed.
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Ethan's birth story
Emerson's birth story started with the Jelly Belly factory tour followed by the Anheuser Busch brewery tour right nearby; Ethan's starts with Family Fun Day featuring Dinosaur World, a fruit punch winery, and Santa at the mall. I guess nothing inspires my body to bring a baby into this world quite so much as ridiculous tourist attractions.
It was at the mall that I first started feeling some light contractions. I didn't want to jinx anything by getting too excited too quickly so I tried to ignore them until they developed into something more definite. Which took a little while. I still wasn't sure if they were worth mentioning to Eric as we were heading to bed at 9pm that night, but I did let him know that something might be happening. (Yes, 9pm. That's how we roll these days.)
I woke up at 11:30pm with the awareness that labor was definitely starting. The contractions were still very manageable but they were more consistent and I could feel they were starting to get more intense. I just laid in bed and breathed through them until midnight when I decided to wake Eric up. Given how crazy it was last time to get the tub filled up I wanted to give him enough time. He got up and went downstairs to start preparations while I stayed in bed a little longer. I was very excited that this meant I would get to meet Ethan soon...and just a little nervous about how hard the labor might be.
At 12:15am I called our midwife Rebecca and gave her the heads up that labor was starting. She said I still sounded a bit too cheery to be in full-blown labor yet but that she was ready to come over whenever we needed her so I should just let her know when to come.
I headed downstairs and labored through contractions standing at the kitchen counter while Eric worked on filling up the tub. I was timing my own contractions and noticed that they seemed to be accelerating. At 12:45 I called Rebecca back and said that while it was probably still a little early, I would feel much better if she were here with us, especially since she lives 45 min away. She said she would be on her way shortly.
By 1am I couldn't manage to time the contractions myself: they were intense enough that I really needed Eric's support with them. He was great at helping me breathe through the contractions and not just make "this hurts too much" noises which are not very useful.
At 1:30, when she should have been arriving, we got a text from the midwife that said the highway was closed and she would be here in another 30 min. I was discouraged by this because I was looking forward to having her support (plus she had some special tricks for easing the pain of back labor, which is apparently a hallmark of labor for me). But I wasn't too worried about it.
So Eric and I continued working through the contractions together. I found that our light brown leather chair helped me with the now incredibly intense and close together contractions and this is where I was when Rebecca finally showed up about 10 minutes before 2am. She brought in all her gear and then came to check in with me.
She suggested I move to the birth ball to labor there for a little while and I immediately regretted leaving the chair: the next contraction was a doozy. As was the next. On the third contraction I suddenly felt that it was time to push and Rebecca knew it too before I even told her. Then my water broke on our expensive new rug. (It cleaned up just fine!)
I had wanted to give birth in the tub like I did with Emerson but the tub was less than half full and the water was scalding hot (Eric learned the hard way the first time that you need the first half of the water to be extra hot because the second half will be cold). Eric began madly dumping ice into the tub while Rebecca helped me walk towards it. We knew it wouldn't be long now before Ethan would be making his big entrance.
I got to the tub but didn't manage to get in it. Instead, I knelt next to it as I felt the next contraction coming. Rebecca asked Eric to grab a towel and when he turned back, Ethan's head had been born. Moments later his body was out as well and Rebecca was handing him to me. It was 2:09am. She had been at our house less than 20 minutes.
The joy of meeting Ethan was immediate. Eric kept saying: "He's beautiful, Ellie." We just looked and looked at him, overwhelmed with amazement and gratitude (and still a little shocked he was already here!). His little eyes peeked open and looked back at us. We all just sat there for a long moment, taking it all in.
And then we heard Emerson shout from upstairs, just like he does when he wakes up from a nap: "Mom! Mom! Dad! Dad!" Eric went and got Emerson and brought him down to meet his new brother.
"Brother," Emerson said. "Yeah."
The next few hours were a happy blur of moving up to our bed, me taking a shower, Eric repeatedly trying to get Emerson to go back to sleep and Ethan's newborn exam where we learned he was 9lb 5oz, 21 inches long and perfectly healthy.
And now we are a family of four.
It was at the mall that I first started feeling some light contractions. I didn't want to jinx anything by getting too excited too quickly so I tried to ignore them until they developed into something more definite. Which took a little while. I still wasn't sure if they were worth mentioning to Eric as we were heading to bed at 9pm that night, but I did let him know that something might be happening. (Yes, 9pm. That's how we roll these days.)
I woke up at 11:30pm with the awareness that labor was definitely starting. The contractions were still very manageable but they were more consistent and I could feel they were starting to get more intense. I just laid in bed and breathed through them until midnight when I decided to wake Eric up. Given how crazy it was last time to get the tub filled up I wanted to give him enough time. He got up and went downstairs to start preparations while I stayed in bed a little longer. I was very excited that this meant I would get to meet Ethan soon...and just a little nervous about how hard the labor might be.
At 12:15am I called our midwife Rebecca and gave her the heads up that labor was starting. She said I still sounded a bit too cheery to be in full-blown labor yet but that she was ready to come over whenever we needed her so I should just let her know when to come.
I headed downstairs and labored through contractions standing at the kitchen counter while Eric worked on filling up the tub. I was timing my own contractions and noticed that they seemed to be accelerating. At 12:45 I called Rebecca back and said that while it was probably still a little early, I would feel much better if she were here with us, especially since she lives 45 min away. She said she would be on her way shortly.
By 1am I couldn't manage to time the contractions myself: they were intense enough that I really needed Eric's support with them. He was great at helping me breathe through the contractions and not just make "this hurts too much" noises which are not very useful.
At 1:30, when she should have been arriving, we got a text from the midwife that said the highway was closed and she would be here in another 30 min. I was discouraged by this because I was looking forward to having her support (plus she had some special tricks for easing the pain of back labor, which is apparently a hallmark of labor for me). But I wasn't too worried about it.
So Eric and I continued working through the contractions together. I found that our light brown leather chair helped me with the now incredibly intense and close together contractions and this is where I was when Rebecca finally showed up about 10 minutes before 2am. She brought in all her gear and then came to check in with me.
She suggested I move to the birth ball to labor there for a little while and I immediately regretted leaving the chair: the next contraction was a doozy. As was the next. On the third contraction I suddenly felt that it was time to push and Rebecca knew it too before I even told her. Then my water broke on our expensive new rug. (It cleaned up just fine!)
I had wanted to give birth in the tub like I did with Emerson but the tub was less than half full and the water was scalding hot (Eric learned the hard way the first time that you need the first half of the water to be extra hot because the second half will be cold). Eric began madly dumping ice into the tub while Rebecca helped me walk towards it. We knew it wouldn't be long now before Ethan would be making his big entrance.
I got to the tub but didn't manage to get in it. Instead, I knelt next to it as I felt the next contraction coming. Rebecca asked Eric to grab a towel and when he turned back, Ethan's head had been born. Moments later his body was out as well and Rebecca was handing him to me. It was 2:09am. She had been at our house less than 20 minutes.
The joy of meeting Ethan was immediate. Eric kept saying: "He's beautiful, Ellie." We just looked and looked at him, overwhelmed with amazement and gratitude (and still a little shocked he was already here!). His little eyes peeked open and looked back at us. We all just sat there for a long moment, taking it all in.
And then we heard Emerson shout from upstairs, just like he does when he wakes up from a nap: "Mom! Mom! Dad! Dad!" Eric went and got Emerson and brought him down to meet his new brother.
"Brother," Emerson said. "Yeah."
The next few hours were a happy blur of moving up to our bed, me taking a shower, Eric repeatedly trying to get Emerson to go back to sleep and Ethan's newborn exam where we learned he was 9lb 5oz, 21 inches long and perfectly healthy.
And now we are a family of four.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Family Fun Day
Eric and I declared Tuesday "Family Fun Day." Eric took off of work and Emerson and I abandoned our usual routine for a day of new adventures.
We started at Dinosaur World, of course. I think the easiest way to explain Dinosaur World would be to say it is like a sculpture garden but in a forest and with dinosaur replicas instead of art. It is clearly someone's dream and you can tell that a lot of thought and attention has been put into making it real.
Emerson liked it starting from the parking lot.
We were literally the only people there for the first hour and a half and it was neat, if a little weird, to have the place to ourselves. We let Emerson roam free and he loved it, except for just a few of the particularly large and scary ones.
Emerson also got to search for fossils in a timed 15 min sand-pit dig where he could keep three of the fossils he found. He and Eric found a lot of teeth and a couple snail-looking rocks just before the buzzer.
On our way to Dinosaur World we had noticed a sign for a winery just a little ways down the road. "Why not?" we thought. This is what Family Fun Day is all about.
Eric did the full tasting - 3 blueberry wines, 2 blackberry wines and about 6 "fusion" wines which are 80% grapes and 20% fruit, for example peach chardonnay and key lime sauvignon blanc. If you like Kool-Aid, this is the winery for you. And the best part: the wine slurpee machine behind the tasting counter (far left in photo, probably acquired when a nearby 7-11 had to close down). We brought home a bottle of the semi-dry blueberry wine and passed on the slurpee (they were low on ice anyway).
After Emerson's nap, Family Fun Day continued at: the Mall. We decided it would be fun to take Emerson to see Santa, though Emerson wasn't too keen on the idea of spending any one-on-one time with Santa so we took a family photo. For the record, I was not expecting to have my photo taken. Here's our last photo as a family of three: I have maximum belly, and Santa's not doing too bad himself.
And, because it was Family Fun Day, Eric and Emerson rode the merry-go-round at the mall as well.
A great time was had by all.
We started at Dinosaur World, of course. I think the easiest way to explain Dinosaur World would be to say it is like a sculpture garden but in a forest and with dinosaur replicas instead of art. It is clearly someone's dream and you can tell that a lot of thought and attention has been put into making it real.
Emerson liked it starting from the parking lot.
Eric did the full tasting - 3 blueberry wines, 2 blackberry wines and about 6 "fusion" wines which are 80% grapes and 20% fruit, for example peach chardonnay and key lime sauvignon blanc. If you like Kool-Aid, this is the winery for you. And the best part: the wine slurpee machine behind the tasting counter (far left in photo, probably acquired when a nearby 7-11 had to close down). We brought home a bottle of the semi-dry blueberry wine and passed on the slurpee (they were low on ice anyway).
Past due
My due date, Sunday, came and went without labor or birth. I didn't really expect it to happen this way this time since I was early last time and second babies tend to come earlier than first ones.
It feels like by not going into labor by my due date I have now missed my chance to have this baby and now I will just be pregnant forever.
It feels like by not going into labor by my due date I have now missed my chance to have this baby and now I will just be pregnant forever.
Friday, December 9, 2011
At the dealership
I had the unexpected pleasure of spending several hours at the Toyota dealership yesterday. After Emerson and I went to his toddler gym class in the morning the Prius would not start. Emerson's response, after instructing the car in a loud voice "Work!" was to go to sleep in his car seat. I made arrangements for AAA to come help us out, and a mere hour and a half later we were jump started and on our way to the closest Toyota dealership to get the car fixed.
By this point it had been a LONG time since breakfast for both of us and of course we couldn't stop the car to get food on the way over there so we did what we had to do: McDonald's drive through.
And there I was: the 9 month pregnant woman feeding herself and her toddler McDonald's for lunch at a car dealership at 2pm. Apparently Florida is having its effect on me whether I like it or not.
A woman standing near me see Emerson's enthusiasm over the french fries ("More! More!") and says "That's good stuff isn't it!"
"I don't normally eat this stuff," I quickly say more than a little defensively.
"I do," she says.
Skip ahead 45 minutes: Emerson has had half of my chocolate milkshake, half a hamburger bun (the "extra" bun in my first ever Big Mac) and the better part of a medium french fries. I have eaten the balance. There are greasy bits of french fry smeared all over the floor below our two chairs. The window behind Emerson's chair is practically opaque from the greasy toddler fingerprints all over the glass and there are shreds from an ESPN magazine strewn around his chair. The others waiting for their cars are all silently praying that the dealership has expedited the repairs on our car.
Emerson is having a big day. His emotions swing wildly from elated and giggly to furious, writhing on the floor. He is bouncing from one thing to the next - shouting loudly in gibberish at people we do not know, trying to pull down the shabby garland hanging from the service desk, pulling all the magazines out of the magazine rack, jumping up and down on an ottoman, asking me to help him search for pictures of dogs on the available computer terminal, and so on.
He is almost unrecognizable as my son. (Except for the dog pictures - that's a standard activity.)
After several hours of the most basic form of damage control parenting on my part and wild toddler antics on Emerson's part, the car is ready. Everyone is happy about this. Emerson tries to insist that he should drive us home but I veto that and decide that I will drive us instead.
By this point it had been a LONG time since breakfast for both of us and of course we couldn't stop the car to get food on the way over there so we did what we had to do: McDonald's drive through.
And there I was: the 9 month pregnant woman feeding herself and her toddler McDonald's for lunch at a car dealership at 2pm. Apparently Florida is having its effect on me whether I like it or not.
A woman standing near me see Emerson's enthusiasm over the french fries ("More! More!") and says "That's good stuff isn't it!"
"I don't normally eat this stuff," I quickly say more than a little defensively.
"I do," she says.
Skip ahead 45 minutes: Emerson has had half of my chocolate milkshake, half a hamburger bun (the "extra" bun in my first ever Big Mac) and the better part of a medium french fries. I have eaten the balance. There are greasy bits of french fry smeared all over the floor below our two chairs. The window behind Emerson's chair is practically opaque from the greasy toddler fingerprints all over the glass and there are shreds from an ESPN magazine strewn around his chair. The others waiting for their cars are all silently praying that the dealership has expedited the repairs on our car.
Emerson is having a big day. His emotions swing wildly from elated and giggly to furious, writhing on the floor. He is bouncing from one thing to the next - shouting loudly in gibberish at people we do not know, trying to pull down the shabby garland hanging from the service desk, pulling all the magazines out of the magazine rack, jumping up and down on an ottoman, asking me to help him search for pictures of dogs on the available computer terminal, and so on.
He is almost unrecognizable as my son. (Except for the dog pictures - that's a standard activity.)
After several hours of the most basic form of damage control parenting on my part and wild toddler antics on Emerson's part, the car is ready. Everyone is happy about this. Emerson tries to insist that he should drive us home but I veto that and decide that I will drive us instead.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
Double gator
Gator Central, aka the pond in our back yard, is currently home to two alligators. One is about 3 feet long, the other one is a little bigger, probably closer to 4 feet long. Yesterday we saw them both creeping around the pond, eyeballs noiselessly gliding through the water. I was watching one of them through the binoculars we now keep in the kitchen for a close-up view when the whole gator's body came up out of the water for a split second and it's jaws cracked down on some form of pond prey. I think I made a sort of loud squawking sound out of a combination of surprise, fear and delight.
I am still not used to watching nature documentaries in my own back yard.
When we get a dog we will need to make sure it is a big one.
I am still not used to watching nature documentaries in my own back yard.
When we get a dog we will need to make sure it is a big one.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Getting bigger every day
I think I remember from last time that the last few weeks of being pregnant are a time of big belly growth.
This time I think it might be even more extreme.
Friday, November 18, 2011
Couldn't wait
Last night it was finally time for our much-anticipated outing to see a live taping of Wait Wait Don't Tell Me, the NPR radio news quiz show. In SF, I listened to this show religiously usually while riding my bike to and from work. When we found out they would be taping in Tampa it was not optional to attend.
My mom and Emerson drove me to campus to meet up with Eric a little after 5pm and then headed home.*
Eric and I left his car parked on campus and walked across the river to have dinner downtown before the show. We ended up at a place called Pizza Fusion which makes an effort to use organic, local ingredients and has really decent pizza. I voluntarily ordered a salad with beets in it because even though I usually think beets taste like dirt for some reason that was what I wanted.**
Toward the end of dinner we learned that a group of 150ish bikers doing some sort of event were about to join us at the tiny pizzeria so we got and paid our check quick-like and got out just as the locust-like swarm started to descend but not before I waited the longest time ever for a woman to emerge from the bathroom.
We still had plenty of time before we had to be in our seats so we made our way slowly toward the Straz Center which was just a few blocks away. As we walked, we heard a train and Eric pointed at the clearly defunct, dilapidated train tracks in the middle of the street we were on and said "Is it going to come down this street?" Ha ha, we both said.
And then we saw the light of the engine up the block. The train was moving at about 3 miles per hour and it was either because of that or in spite of that that people kept crossing the street right in front of it. We resisted the temptation to dodge the glacial train and enjoyed watching it go by. It was an engine pulling one car: a huge tank marked as Chlorine. Probably heading straight to the water reclamation facility, or to some really old-fashioned pool supply shop.
The Straz Center was abuzz when we arrived, partly due I think to the number of restaurants that are part of the facility. It seems to be a large complex with a lot of theaters, a lot of restaurants and lot of carpet reminiscent of a roller skating center from the 80s. Eric got a (large) drink and we strolled around to check it out. At 7:15, 15 min before showtime, they opened the doors and flashed the lights, our signal to head inside. Eric was getting ready to down his drink when we noticed people were taking their drinks with them into the theater. What's this? Here's another way Florida, or at least the Straz Center, is unique: you can drink during the show. Remarkable. I suspect I will appreciate that more when I am not pregnant.
This being a radio show I had absolutely no idea what to expect visually from the disembodied voices I so enjoy. My observations (from pretty far away from the stage): Peter Sagal, who I love, is not as warm-feeling in person as he is on the radio; Karl Cassel is exactly as old as I expected and surprisingly spry, Adam Felber was not the skinny young nerd I have always pictured but rather a not so skinny-not so young-not so nerdy comedian type, Faith Salie is much hotter than one would guess from the radio, and Roy Blount Jr is exactly what you would expect.
The Tampa audience was engaged and appreciated Peter's backhanded appreciation of Florida, the governor, etc. The audience did have a hard time not saying the answer out loud in unison during the fill-in-the-blank limerick part of the show.. I think it was Roy who said "This is like church for these people, they can't help themselves."
It was fascinating to hear the unedited show and guess what they would likely take out. I look forward to listening to the podcast (while not riding a bike) and hearing how they edited it. I will also be listening for the sound of myself clapping.
*Actually, as I found out later, to Chipotle for a dinner of burritos
**I don't think it is pica
My mom and Emerson drove me to campus to meet up with Eric a little after 5pm and then headed home.*
Eric and I left his car parked on campus and walked across the river to have dinner downtown before the show. We ended up at a place called Pizza Fusion which makes an effort to use organic, local ingredients and has really decent pizza. I voluntarily ordered a salad with beets in it because even though I usually think beets taste like dirt for some reason that was what I wanted.**
Toward the end of dinner we learned that a group of 150ish bikers doing some sort of event were about to join us at the tiny pizzeria so we got and paid our check quick-like and got out just as the locust-like swarm started to descend but not before I waited the longest time ever for a woman to emerge from the bathroom.
We still had plenty of time before we had to be in our seats so we made our way slowly toward the Straz Center which was just a few blocks away. As we walked, we heard a train and Eric pointed at the clearly defunct, dilapidated train tracks in the middle of the street we were on and said "Is it going to come down this street?" Ha ha, we both said.
And then we saw the light of the engine up the block. The train was moving at about 3 miles per hour and it was either because of that or in spite of that that people kept crossing the street right in front of it. We resisted the temptation to dodge the glacial train and enjoyed watching it go by. It was an engine pulling one car: a huge tank marked as Chlorine. Probably heading straight to the water reclamation facility, or to some really old-fashioned pool supply shop.
The Straz Center was abuzz when we arrived, partly due I think to the number of restaurants that are part of the facility. It seems to be a large complex with a lot of theaters, a lot of restaurants and lot of carpet reminiscent of a roller skating center from the 80s. Eric got a (large) drink and we strolled around to check it out. At 7:15, 15 min before showtime, they opened the doors and flashed the lights, our signal to head inside. Eric was getting ready to down his drink when we noticed people were taking their drinks with them into the theater. What's this? Here's another way Florida, or at least the Straz Center, is unique: you can drink during the show. Remarkable. I suspect I will appreciate that more when I am not pregnant.
This being a radio show I had absolutely no idea what to expect visually from the disembodied voices I so enjoy. My observations (from pretty far away from the stage): Peter Sagal, who I love, is not as warm-feeling in person as he is on the radio; Karl Cassel is exactly as old as I expected and surprisingly spry, Adam Felber was not the skinny young nerd I have always pictured but rather a not so skinny-not so young-not so nerdy comedian type, Faith Salie is much hotter than one would guess from the radio, and Roy Blount Jr is exactly what you would expect.
The Tampa audience was engaged and appreciated Peter's backhanded appreciation of Florida, the governor, etc. The audience did have a hard time not saying the answer out loud in unison during the fill-in-the-blank limerick part of the show.. I think it was Roy who said "This is like church for these people, they can't help themselves."
It was fascinating to hear the unedited show and guess what they would likely take out. I look forward to listening to the podcast (while not riding a bike) and hearing how they edited it. I will also be listening for the sound of myself clapping.
*Actually, as I found out later, to Chipotle for a dinner of burritos
**I don't think it is pica
Thursday, November 17, 2011
For the list of Ways Tampa is Different from San Francisco
Post script added Saturday: I turned on the hose on the patio today and several more of these tiny frogs came hopping out of it before the water came.
Tiny frogs everywhere!
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Night out: Hockey!
We took advantage of Gama being in town to go out Tuesday night to see some college hockey. The match-up was Eric's own University of Tampa, whose hockey team is in its first year as an official team, facing off against the University of South Florida which is also here in Tampa. The event was set up as a fundraiser (with free admission) and they played the game at the St Pete Times forum in downtown Tampa.(One of Eric's students who plays on the team had said
that he was excited about maybe getting into a fight on NHL ice.)
We put Emerson to bed and still got there in time for the pre-game pageantry, including the national anthem sung by a small a capella foursome, one of whom had his hand to his ear the whole time, of course. It was neat to be at the arena for such a "small" event where the spectators were confined to a small section of seating, only one concession stand was open and we got to sit a lot closer than we normally do.
This was my first UT sporting event and it set the bar pretty high. Here's a shot of the action:
I didn't set the bar so high myself: I sported yoga pants, a large black maternity t-shirt that the light of the arena revealed had booger stains (not mine) and sneakers, dirty hair in a bun and my scratched glasses. I looked like the exhausted, mega-pregnant mom of a toddler that I am right now.* I guess I thought it would be darker at the hockey game (it usually is a little darker up high where we always sit). I thought about standing at a discrete distance when we ran into students of Eric's so as not to embarrass him but instead I just smiled and tried to stand in the shadows as much as possible.
The game was great fun to watch and when we left after the second period it was 3-2 USF. The final score was 5-4 USF so going to bed meant we missed some good action but for my part it was worth it.
*For the record: in general, I have made what I consider to be an extraordinary effort to present myself well since we arrived in Florida.
We put Emerson to bed and still got there in time for the pre-game pageantry, including the national anthem sung by a small a capella foursome, one of whom had his hand to his ear the whole time, of course. It was neat to be at the arena for such a "small" event where the spectators were confined to a small section of seating, only one concession stand was open and we got to sit a lot closer than we normally do.
This was my first UT sporting event and it set the bar pretty high. Here's a shot of the action:
The game was great fun to watch and when we left after the second period it was 3-2 USF. The final score was 5-4 USF so going to bed meant we missed some good action but for my part it was worth it.
*For the record: in general, I have made what I consider to be an extraordinary effort to present myself well since we arrived in Florida.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Paddleboat Joe
Eric's mother Joy was in St Pete Beach for a dancing event this weekend and we took advantage of her relative proximity to go meet her for dinner last night. My mom, Emerson and I drove down a little early to poke around the beach a bit and Eric joined us as soon as he was out of an all-day training for work.
Being 36 weeks pregnant, I thought nothing of driving down there with my pants half-pulled-down to take the pressure off my lower belly. I was wearing a long top and no skin was showing or anything scandalous like that. It was just necessary.
So when we pulled into the hotel and the only option was to valet the car, I hastily locked the doors, rolled down my window and told the valet that we "needed a minute" before we were ready to get out of the car. Then I waited for him to get far enough away from the car that I could pull my pants all the way back up before unlocking the doors.
Once again fully wearing my pants, I headed with my mom and Emerson to explore a little bit before we were going to meet Joy. The valet pointed us toward Pirate Island and there we discovered Paddleboat Joe and his fleet (of paddleboats). Paddleboat Joe was an older black gentleman who seemed born for his job: quick-witted and engaging, delighted by everyone who walked by.
It was clear that we had to go for a ride.
If driving a car with pants on was too much lower belly pressure then forget about pedal-powering a small watercraft while wearing those same pants. Luckily, my mother was happy to do the legwork while Emerson and I took turns steering us into the edges of the channel which wended its way around the hotel property, never more than about 18 inches deep.
Eric arrived about halfway through our paddleboat adventure and didn't hesitate to jump on board. I moved to the backseat and chatted with a caterpillar who was hitch-hiking while Eric gave Gail some needed support on the pedals.
When we pulled back into the dock, Paddleboat Joe had a lot to say about our having gained a passenger on the short ride. Eric told Paddleboat Joe that we had offered him $5 to help us pedal.
Being 36 weeks pregnant, I thought nothing of driving down there with my pants half-pulled-down to take the pressure off my lower belly. I was wearing a long top and no skin was showing or anything scandalous like that. It was just necessary.
So when we pulled into the hotel and the only option was to valet the car, I hastily locked the doors, rolled down my window and told the valet that we "needed a minute" before we were ready to get out of the car. Then I waited for him to get far enough away from the car that I could pull my pants all the way back up before unlocking the doors.
Once again fully wearing my pants, I headed with my mom and Emerson to explore a little bit before we were going to meet Joy. The valet pointed us toward Pirate Island and there we discovered Paddleboat Joe and his fleet (of paddleboats). Paddleboat Joe was an older black gentleman who seemed born for his job: quick-witted and engaging, delighted by everyone who walked by.
It was clear that we had to go for a ride.
If driving a car with pants on was too much lower belly pressure then forget about pedal-powering a small watercraft while wearing those same pants. Luckily, my mother was happy to do the legwork while Emerson and I took turns steering us into the edges of the channel which wended its way around the hotel property, never more than about 18 inches deep.
Eric arrived about halfway through our paddleboat adventure and didn't hesitate to jump on board. I moved to the backseat and chatted with a caterpillar who was hitch-hiking while Eric gave Gail some needed support on the pedals.
When we pulled back into the dock, Paddleboat Joe had a lot to say about our having gained a passenger on the short ride. Eric told Paddleboat Joe that we had offered him $5 to help us pedal.
Saturday, November 12, 2011
Good question
My mother is here for a week which means Eric and I are hitting the town every chance we get.
Friday night we went out for dinner at a local spot near our house. It was the kind of place that could be a chain but isn't (as far as we can tell). When we got there the senior crew and the families with young kids were on their way out and the date night-ers were on their way in.
As we waited for a table an older gentleman approached Eric and asked in an almost accusatory tone:
"Who has the better looking bald head - me or you?"
"Ah, I think that would have to be you," replied Eric, with just the slightest hesitation.
"You got that right!" the man guffawed.
"It's a good night out," Eric observed. And he was right.
Friday night we went out for dinner at a local spot near our house. It was the kind of place that could be a chain but isn't (as far as we can tell). When we got there the senior crew and the families with young kids were on their way out and the date night-ers were on their way in.
As we waited for a table an older gentleman approached Eric and asked in an almost accusatory tone:
"Who has the better looking bald head - me or you?"
"Ah, I think that would have to be you," replied Eric, with just the slightest hesitation.
"You got that right!" the man guffawed.
"It's a good night out," Eric observed. And he was right.
Sunday, November 6, 2011
35 weeks
Today I am officially 35 weeks, or about 8 months, pregnant with Groucho, a little brother for Emerson. I'm not really sure where the time has gone, at least partly because I think I am actively trying to repress the memory of our first few months here in Florida in the middle of the pregnancy. But I wanted to take a moment to write down what's going on with this pregnancy because this blog is actually a replacement for my brain which doesn't always hold onto memories so well right now even when I want it to.
This pregnancy has been different from my pregnancy with Emerson in a couple of major ways. For one, I had a sugar aversion with Emerson and while that didn't stop me completely from the occasional cupcake it did mean I wasn't so much into sweets for that 9 months. With Groucho, I have had the opposite experience. I would eat exclusively sugar and be perfectly happy if that were a remotely acceptable thing to do, which of course it is not. Before we knew Groucho was a boy, this made me suspect that baby #2 would be a girl. I guess it just means he'll be a super sweet boy.
As I think is typical, I showed a lot sooner this time than I did the first time around. I had a very pregnant-looking belly pretty quickly this time which was nice in that I got to "feel" pregnant sooner, but was distressing because the trajectory suggested I would end up three times the size I did with Emerson. The good news I can report from 35 weeks that I didn't know at 15 weeks is that I plateaued significantly in the weight gain category and seem on track to be about the same amount of large as I was last time.
For those middle months when we were living in temporary furnished purgatory, I had a lot of back pain and I blamed it on the pregnancy. What I discovered after two nights of sleeping in my own bed is that it was just the terrible, terrible mattress in that grim little condo and my back has been in great shape ever since.
I have also noticed ways that Groucho himself is already different than Emerson. The way he moves around is different - more sharp and sudden movements and more stretching where I feel him seemingly at my collarbone and halfway down my thigh at the same time. He has also not had the hiccups nearly as much as Emerson did.
Groucho is great company and I am really excited to meet him on the outside in not too long.
This pregnancy has been different from my pregnancy with Emerson in a couple of major ways. For one, I had a sugar aversion with Emerson and while that didn't stop me completely from the occasional cupcake it did mean I wasn't so much into sweets for that 9 months. With Groucho, I have had the opposite experience. I would eat exclusively sugar and be perfectly happy if that were a remotely acceptable thing to do, which of course it is not. Before we knew Groucho was a boy, this made me suspect that baby #2 would be a girl. I guess it just means he'll be a super sweet boy.
As I think is typical, I showed a lot sooner this time than I did the first time around. I had a very pregnant-looking belly pretty quickly this time which was nice in that I got to "feel" pregnant sooner, but was distressing because the trajectory suggested I would end up three times the size I did with Emerson. The good news I can report from 35 weeks that I didn't know at 15 weeks is that I plateaued significantly in the weight gain category and seem on track to be about the same amount of large as I was last time.
For those middle months when we were living in temporary furnished purgatory, I had a lot of back pain and I blamed it on the pregnancy. What I discovered after two nights of sleeping in my own bed is that it was just the terrible, terrible mattress in that grim little condo and my back has been in great shape ever since.
I have also noticed ways that Groucho himself is already different than Emerson. The way he moves around is different - more sharp and sudden movements and more stretching where I feel him seemingly at my collarbone and halfway down my thigh at the same time. He has also not had the hiccups nearly as much as Emerson did.
Groucho is great company and I am really excited to meet him on the outside in not too long.
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Not exactly news
The Onion, always honest in news reporting if not always accurate, had this headline recently: Study Finds Every Style Of Parenting Produces Disturbed, Miserable Adults.
The last line is my favorite: "The study did find, however, that adults often achieve temporary happiness when they have children of their own to perpetuate the cycle of human misery."
The last line is my favorite: "The study did find, however, that adults often achieve temporary happiness when they have children of their own to perpetuate the cycle of human misery."
Friday, October 28, 2011
Settling in
Today marks three weeks that we are sleeping in our house. I think I love this house. It is huge and beautiful and we can watch the sunset sitting by the pool like we are on a tropical vacation. And it is falling apart more than I would have expected from a house that is not even 16 years old.
The two major house projects (new roof, hardwood floor installation) that we cleverly scheduled to have completed before we moved in should, if we are lucky, both be finished by early next week. The best worst moment of all happened yesterday when I opened the front door to give the roofer the final check and there was house paint running down the roof and onto the plants and the sidewalk and front stoop. The roofer had gone up to put the final coat of paint on some stucco that they had to replace and kicked over the can of paint. Truly unbelievable.
And it's the little things: Emerson, without even trying that hard, pulled the drapes right out of the wall. The screws holding together the screen covering that goes over the patio and pool are so rusted out that a stiff wind will probably blow the whole thing into the gulf of Mexico. And so on. But then you sit on our new patio "conversation set" and watch the sunset and everything is kind of perfect.
The two major house projects (new roof, hardwood floor installation) that we cleverly scheduled to have completed before we moved in should, if we are lucky, both be finished by early next week. The best worst moment of all happened yesterday when I opened the front door to give the roofer the final check and there was house paint running down the roof and onto the plants and the sidewalk and front stoop. The roofer had gone up to put the final coat of paint on some stucco that they had to replace and kicked over the can of paint. Truly unbelievable.
And it's the little things: Emerson, without even trying that hard, pulled the drapes right out of the wall. The screws holding together the screen covering that goes over the patio and pool are so rusted out that a stiff wind will probably blow the whole thing into the gulf of Mexico. And so on. But then you sit on our new patio "conversation set" and watch the sunset and everything is kind of perfect.
Thursday, October 27, 2011
Two years
Tuesday was Eric and my second wedding anniversary. Neither one of us can recall what we did for our first but I am sure it was wonderful. This one was celebrated in stages: a nice dinner on Sunday grilled on our new grill (a housewarming present from Joy and Dan - thank you!), gift-giving on Tuesday, and then watching our wedding video (thank you Andrew!) on Wednesday.
I'm OK with the anniversary day not being that memorable when everything else in our lives is. As crazy as life is right now, I couldn't imagine it being more fun with anyone else.
I'm OK with the anniversary day not being that memorable when everything else in our lives is. As crazy as life is right now, I couldn't imagine it being more fun with anyone else.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
A first
A conference first for me today: at a session on IKEA's partnership with UNICEF they showed a video on the work they are doing with children in South Africa that just got to me for some reason and I cried. A little at first, then more. It was the last part of the session so I knew if I could survive the video I could get to the bathroom and pull myself together.
As I was trying to make my eyes look less red and puffy, other women in the bathroom tried to be nice to me. One woman in the bathroom who had also seen the video said "Oh bless your heart." Another said she had also teared up a bit.
One woman who had been at a different breakout session wasn't sure what to make of it. "Your session made you cry? That bad?"
I don't know if it was the African music or the young children or being really tired and really pregnant or maybe just all of it together. I couldn't help but cry.
I'm hoping for a less dramatic day tomorrow.
As I was trying to make my eyes look less red and puffy, other women in the bathroom tried to be nice to me. One woman in the bathroom who had also seen the video said "Oh bless your heart." Another said she had also teared up a bit.
One woman who had been at a different breakout session wasn't sure what to make of it. "Your session made you cry? That bad?"
I don't know if it was the African music or the young children or being really tired and really pregnant or maybe just all of it together. I couldn't help but cry.
I'm hoping for a less dramatic day tomorrow.
Wednesday, October 12, 2011
The whole story
Something about being away from home for a day or two brings me here to the blog. My last blog was written on my final trip to St Louis to finish up the project I have been doing there for almost a year. Tonight I am in Orlando - not too far from home - at a conference where my company wanted to have a presence. I don't know if it is that being away gives me perspective or if it just provides me with that extra time and space needed to sit down and write for a few minutes. Likely both.
These past few months have been hard (with a lot of wonderful good moments sprinkled in) and while I really wanted to document the experience in the moment I found it too hard, both emotionally and logistically. I wanted to write real-time to capture my transition from being a snooty, sophisticated, layer-toting San Franciscan to being a suburban Florida mom who wears the same three maternity dresses from Target in rotation. It's a lot of ground to cover and I have done it in just over two months. I will spare you the photos.
On Friday night we slept at our new house for the first time. I made the call to just go live there already, since we have owned it since Sept 21 and yet continued to pay rent to live in a tiny dump. But it was clear very quickly that moving in before the hardwood floors upstairs were done (oh the dust!) and while the roof is still being replaced (several weeks behind schedule) was unwise, to say the least. But we stuck it out: we threw a mattress on the floor of the family room and set up Emerson's crib in the dining room and tried not to breathe in too much dust or touch anything.
I love our house. It is so ridiculously large that the same furniture that made our 3 bedroom San Francisco apartment feel cramped makes our Tampa house appear abandoned. It is so nice that Eric and I will occasionally whisper to each other "Whose house is this?" and then we genuinely surprised that the answer is "ours."
For me, starting to sleep in our house is really the beginning of our lives in Tampa. We have already met a lot of neighbors and are cautiously optimistic that we are on a really good block: tons of families with small children, a good mix of different kinds of people with different jobs. Some neighbors already brought us cookies.
The thing that got me about the house from the beginning is the pond out back. It is a very pretty retention pond that is also important wildlife habitat and sometimes in the dark pre-dawn when Emerson and I are out in the screened-in porch area we can hear things splashing in it. Apparently it only has baby gators - once they get to 6 feet the county removes them.
Sleeping in my own bed has also been a major life quality improvement. I had thought that this pregnancy was just harder on my low back than the first one but after a couple nights in my own amazing bed my back issues are gone and I wake up feeling rested instead of like I spent the night getting beat up. It was just two and a half months of terrible beds that got my low back so pissed off.
Having my mother, known these days as Gama, with us for a few months was also a great gift. I don't know how we will thank her for everything she has done to help us out. I have particularly appreciated her help as it enabled me to hold onto my last shreds of sanity during these few months of chaotic transition. And it has been great for Emerson to hang out with her and get to know her a bit better.
One of the added bonuses of having Gama around is that Eric and I got to go out more than normal. We saw a lot of movies. We saw Cowboys & Aliens and Super 8 at the super cheap ($3!) movie theater we could walk to from the condo. It is the kind of place where it's the same woman who is popping the popcorn, selling tickets, checking your purse to make sure you aren't smuggling in outside candy, and then running the projector. They don't even have the lights on a dimmer: it's just the flip of a switch. We had to make sure to leave before they turned the lights back on at the end.
Most recently we saw Contagion because Eric felt a professional responsibility to be able to comment on the accuracy of the science in the movie and also because I think he particularly likes movies where virologists are the heroes. When I asked him halfway through if he thought this sort of thing might ever actually happen he said "Oh it's inevitable - and we (society) are completely unprepared to deal with it." I guess the good news is either you die or you don't and there probably isn't much you can do about it. I am not going to start worrying about it.
After Friday this week I am done done done with work for a little while. I am looking forward to spending all my time with Emerson, to feeling less stretched and maybe even relaxed and to eventually getting unpacked in our new place. And if I am lucky, to many naps in my own bed.
These past few months have been hard (with a lot of wonderful good moments sprinkled in) and while I really wanted to document the experience in the moment I found it too hard, both emotionally and logistically. I wanted to write real-time to capture my transition from being a snooty, sophisticated, layer-toting San Franciscan to being a suburban Florida mom who wears the same three maternity dresses from Target in rotation. It's a lot of ground to cover and I have done it in just over two months. I will spare you the photos.
On Friday night we slept at our new house for the first time. I made the call to just go live there already, since we have owned it since Sept 21 and yet continued to pay rent to live in a tiny dump. But it was clear very quickly that moving in before the hardwood floors upstairs were done (oh the dust!) and while the roof is still being replaced (several weeks behind schedule) was unwise, to say the least. But we stuck it out: we threw a mattress on the floor of the family room and set up Emerson's crib in the dining room and tried not to breathe in too much dust or touch anything.
I love our house. It is so ridiculously large that the same furniture that made our 3 bedroom San Francisco apartment feel cramped makes our Tampa house appear abandoned. It is so nice that Eric and I will occasionally whisper to each other "Whose house is this?" and then we genuinely surprised that the answer is "ours."
For me, starting to sleep in our house is really the beginning of our lives in Tampa. We have already met a lot of neighbors and are cautiously optimistic that we are on a really good block: tons of families with small children, a good mix of different kinds of people with different jobs. Some neighbors already brought us cookies.
The thing that got me about the house from the beginning is the pond out back. It is a very pretty retention pond that is also important wildlife habitat and sometimes in the dark pre-dawn when Emerson and I are out in the screened-in porch area we can hear things splashing in it. Apparently it only has baby gators - once they get to 6 feet the county removes them.
Sleeping in my own bed has also been a major life quality improvement. I had thought that this pregnancy was just harder on my low back than the first one but after a couple nights in my own amazing bed my back issues are gone and I wake up feeling rested instead of like I spent the night getting beat up. It was just two and a half months of terrible beds that got my low back so pissed off.
Having my mother, known these days as Gama, with us for a few months was also a great gift. I don't know how we will thank her for everything she has done to help us out. I have particularly appreciated her help as it enabled me to hold onto my last shreds of sanity during these few months of chaotic transition. And it has been great for Emerson to hang out with her and get to know her a bit better.
One of the added bonuses of having Gama around is that Eric and I got to go out more than normal. We saw a lot of movies. We saw Cowboys & Aliens and Super 8 at the super cheap ($3!) movie theater we could walk to from the condo. It is the kind of place where it's the same woman who is popping the popcorn, selling tickets, checking your purse to make sure you aren't smuggling in outside candy, and then running the projector. They don't even have the lights on a dimmer: it's just the flip of a switch. We had to make sure to leave before they turned the lights back on at the end.
Most recently we saw Contagion because Eric felt a professional responsibility to be able to comment on the accuracy of the science in the movie and also because I think he particularly likes movies where virologists are the heroes. When I asked him halfway through if he thought this sort of thing might ever actually happen he said "Oh it's inevitable - and we (society) are completely unprepared to deal with it." I guess the good news is either you die or you don't and there probably isn't much you can do about it. I am not going to start worrying about it.
After Friday this week I am done done done with work for a little while. I am looking forward to spending all my time with Emerson, to feeling less stretched and maybe even relaxed and to eventually getting unpacked in our new place. And if I am lucky, to many naps in my own bed.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Country night
Eric and I attended our first Tampa sporting event on Saturday night: a Tampa Bay Rays game at their indoor stadium in St Petersburg. Who ever heard of an indoor baseball stadium?
Though I have largely kicked the San Francisco habit of bringing a layer since it is always 95 everywhere all the time I had a feeling it would be chilly in there, so I brought a sweater. What I should have brought instead was my cowboy boots, hat and shirt because that's what everyone else brought. It was Country Night at the ballpark.
There were many ways that Country Night was celebrated. They handed out blue Rays-branded cowbells to something like the first 10,000 people who entered the stadium and people were not shy about ringing them. Every time a Ray got a hit or made a good catch it was like a huge herd of cows suddenly startled and took off running, cow bells clanging like crazy. The kid next to me didn't even wait for anything to happen - he just rang it constantly until the woman in front of us turned around and asked him nicely but quite firmly to "take it easy" with the cowbell. The poor kid didn't ring it again the whole game.
More country-ness: Jeff Foxworthy on video opened up the game with a bit on "You might be a Rays fan if..." which reminded me that there are more people that you think who are able to turn one not very clever idea into a lifelong career as a performer.
Even more country-ness: after the game they held a free live country music concert on the field. The performer was Miranda something who was a participant on Nashville Star.
The game was memorable in other ways, too. After the fourth inning Eric and I went to get some food. I ordered the "Heater" which is a chili-cheese hot dog.
"Whoa!" exclaimed the woman taking our order. "You want that baby to come tonight?" She seemed genuinely concerned and/or horrified, but I stuck with my order. I think I just liked the name.
Eric, no fool, quickly determined that the large beer, which was 20 oz for $9, was a worse deal than two regular beers, which were 12 oz for $5 each. I didn't think I cared one way or the other which one he got until it became clear that I was going to have to sherpa the second beer up the 30 steps to our very last row seats past many, many disapproving country folk. Before we even got half-way up Eric started calling out to no one in particular "It's mine! She's carrying it for me!" and presumably people knew he meant both the beer and the baby. But they still gave me the stinkiest of the stink eye and shook their cowbells disapprovingly in my direction.
As for the baseball itself, there were actually a few remarkable plays all of which involved players not catching balls that they had no excuse to miss. My personal theory: as they looked up to follow the ball they got so distracted by the fact that there was a ceiling over their heads (and a racket of cowbells in their ears) that they thought they must be dreaming and completely forgot about the ball until it dropped to the astro-turf in their general vicinity. It was just bizarre.
I can't wait to go see a hockey game.
Though I have largely kicked the San Francisco habit of bringing a layer since it is always 95 everywhere all the time I had a feeling it would be chilly in there, so I brought a sweater. What I should have brought instead was my cowboy boots, hat and shirt because that's what everyone else brought. It was Country Night at the ballpark.
There were many ways that Country Night was celebrated. They handed out blue Rays-branded cowbells to something like the first 10,000 people who entered the stadium and people were not shy about ringing them. Every time a Ray got a hit or made a good catch it was like a huge herd of cows suddenly startled and took off running, cow bells clanging like crazy. The kid next to me didn't even wait for anything to happen - he just rang it constantly until the woman in front of us turned around and asked him nicely but quite firmly to "take it easy" with the cowbell. The poor kid didn't ring it again the whole game.
More country-ness: Jeff Foxworthy on video opened up the game with a bit on "You might be a Rays fan if..." which reminded me that there are more people that you think who are able to turn one not very clever idea into a lifelong career as a performer.
Even more country-ness: after the game they held a free live country music concert on the field. The performer was Miranda something who was a participant on Nashville Star.
The game was memorable in other ways, too. After the fourth inning Eric and I went to get some food. I ordered the "Heater" which is a chili-cheese hot dog.
"Whoa!" exclaimed the woman taking our order. "You want that baby to come tonight?" She seemed genuinely concerned and/or horrified, but I stuck with my order. I think I just liked the name.
Eric, no fool, quickly determined that the large beer, which was 20 oz for $9, was a worse deal than two regular beers, which were 12 oz for $5 each. I didn't think I cared one way or the other which one he got until it became clear that I was going to have to sherpa the second beer up the 30 steps to our very last row seats past many, many disapproving country folk. Before we even got half-way up Eric started calling out to no one in particular "It's mine! She's carrying it for me!" and presumably people knew he meant both the beer and the baby. But they still gave me the stinkiest of the stink eye and shook their cowbells disapprovingly in my direction.
As for the baseball itself, there were actually a few remarkable plays all of which involved players not catching balls that they had no excuse to miss. My personal theory: as they looked up to follow the ball they got so distracted by the fact that there was a ceiling over their heads (and a racket of cowbells in their ears) that they thought they must be dreaming and completely forgot about the ball until it dropped to the astro-turf in their general vicinity. It was just bizarre.
I can't wait to go see a hockey game.
Friday, September 23, 2011
We bought it
On Wednesday evening we officially purchased our first home. All it required was all of the money we have ever made*, plus a lot of signatures.Here it is!
It is much too large for us and has a pool. From our bedroom window you can see a palm tree. Eric and I keep asking each other: is this really our house?
I am a healthy mix of excited, daunted, eager to actually move in and completely exhausted (though this last one is not just because of the house).
We won't actually be moving in for a couple of weeks because what's left of our money will be going towards a new roof, new floors for the upstairs and a thorough de-cat-ifying of the house so that Eric doesn't need to live on Claritin for as long as we live in this house.
All of our worldly belongings should arrive by October 14th but we have been warned by other people who have moved that we shouldn't really be too confident that will actually happen. We may be urban camping for quite a while.
*Just most of it, actually. Not all of it. I promise.
I am a healthy mix of excited, daunted, eager to actually move in and completely exhausted (though this last one is not just because of the house).
We won't actually be moving in for a couple of weeks because what's left of our money will be going towards a new roof, new floors for the upstairs and a thorough de-cat-ifying of the house so that Eric doesn't need to live on Claritin for as long as we live in this house.
All of our worldly belongings should arrive by October 14th but we have been warned by other people who have moved that we shouldn't really be too confident that will actually happen. We may be urban camping for quite a while.
*Just most of it, actually. Not all of it. I promise.
Sunday, September 11, 2011
Our transformation continues
We are now a two-car family.
As our experience with the house has demonstrated time and again, I can really struggle with these large purchases. I get a little paranoid that everyone knows something I don't and is trying to take advantage of my lack of savvy*. So I tried to put on my best economics-major mindset and recognize that while there is information asymmetry (I believe "buying a used car" is the example in the text book) that doesn't have to make me a sucker. I think that Seinfeld episode about the dealership has also been quite influential in my thinking about car buying. No undercoating for me!
We have been looking around for a used Prius because the Nissan Leaf is not yet available in Florida. I would like for us to be totally off petroleum vehicles in the next few years, or as soon as possible. That didn't stop me from having a brief crush on the Lexus hybrid SUV but I got over it when I realized our 94 Honda still gets better gas mileage than most hybrid SUVs.
Per craigslist, which has used vehicles for sale both by owner and by dealers, there were a bunch of used Priuses in our price range, including one which boasted a dent on the front bumper from hitting a raccoon. We arranged to see the most promising ones for sale at two different places and just to be sure we were set up for success, we made sure Emerson ate and napped poorly all day before going car-shopping.
The first "dealer" was a couple of Ukrainains and their pit bull Eos who rent a small storage warehouse in a row of other small storage warehouses. We were extremely dubious. Eric took the maroon Prius for a drive while I let Emerson do his new favorite thing: sit in the driver's seat of our car and let him "drive" (while car is parked). He wiggles the steering wheel, tries to honk the horn, pushes the climate control buttons and changes the stations on the radio. He is in heaven.
Eric reported that this particular Prius was both stinkier and louder than our 94 Honda and Boss Ukranian told him he had actually bought it from a dealer who had it priced several thousand dollars higher. Wha?! With so much weirdness, we decided to move on but not before Eos attempted to lick Emerson's face clean off his head. Emerson was delighted by it, of course, and the dog was perfectly friendly about it, if a bit persistent.
Our next stop was a Toyota dealership with a white Prius we had been particularly interested in. When we walked up, another couple was talking to a salesman about the Prius so Eric found a different salesman and immediately asked to take it for a drive. Meanwhile, Emerson and I had fun exploring the dealership. We found the powdered sugar trail leading to the now-empty boxes of donuts (note to self: go car-shopping earlier in the day). Emerson got a big blue balloon to play with. Emerson found the donation box of unopened toys that was clearly heading to needy Florida children and decided some of the toys needed a little breaking in.
When they returned from the test drive, the other people were there ready and waiting to take it for a spin but Eric convinced our salesman to let me take it out first. I enjoyed the test drive and without giving up the keys, Bob and I went to his desk to discuss the deal. After a speedy negotiation, we agreed on a price ($1,000 off the asking price!) and we bought the car! Sorry to the other people. I'm sure they will find something else that they like.
I got to drive the pretty new white Prius all the way home and now all we need to do is name her.
*This from the daughter of the woman who would walk into car dealerships and announce to the salesperson "I don't know anything about cars"
As our experience with the house has demonstrated time and again, I can really struggle with these large purchases. I get a little paranoid that everyone knows something I don't and is trying to take advantage of my lack of savvy*. So I tried to put on my best economics-major mindset and recognize that while there is information asymmetry (I believe "buying a used car" is the example in the text book) that doesn't have to make me a sucker. I think that Seinfeld episode about the dealership has also been quite influential in my thinking about car buying. No undercoating for me!
We have been looking around for a used Prius because the Nissan Leaf is not yet available in Florida. I would like for us to be totally off petroleum vehicles in the next few years, or as soon as possible. That didn't stop me from having a brief crush on the Lexus hybrid SUV but I got over it when I realized our 94 Honda still gets better gas mileage than most hybrid SUVs.
Per craigslist, which has used vehicles for sale both by owner and by dealers, there were a bunch of used Priuses in our price range, including one which boasted a dent on the front bumper from hitting a raccoon. We arranged to see the most promising ones for sale at two different places and just to be sure we were set up for success, we made sure Emerson ate and napped poorly all day before going car-shopping.
The first "dealer" was a couple of Ukrainains and their pit bull Eos who rent a small storage warehouse in a row of other small storage warehouses. We were extremely dubious. Eric took the maroon Prius for a drive while I let Emerson do his new favorite thing: sit in the driver's seat of our car and let him "drive" (while car is parked). He wiggles the steering wheel, tries to honk the horn, pushes the climate control buttons and changes the stations on the radio. He is in heaven.
Eric reported that this particular Prius was both stinkier and louder than our 94 Honda and Boss Ukranian told him he had actually bought it from a dealer who had it priced several thousand dollars higher. Wha?! With so much weirdness, we decided to move on but not before Eos attempted to lick Emerson's face clean off his head. Emerson was delighted by it, of course, and the dog was perfectly friendly about it, if a bit persistent.
Our next stop was a Toyota dealership with a white Prius we had been particularly interested in. When we walked up, another couple was talking to a salesman about the Prius so Eric found a different salesman and immediately asked to take it for a drive. Meanwhile, Emerson and I had fun exploring the dealership. We found the powdered sugar trail leading to the now-empty boxes of donuts (note to self: go car-shopping earlier in the day). Emerson got a big blue balloon to play with. Emerson found the donation box of unopened toys that was clearly heading to needy Florida children and decided some of the toys needed a little breaking in.
When they returned from the test drive, the other people were there ready and waiting to take it for a spin but Eric convinced our salesman to let me take it out first. I enjoyed the test drive and without giving up the keys, Bob and I went to his desk to discuss the deal. After a speedy negotiation, we agreed on a price ($1,000 off the asking price!) and we bought the car! Sorry to the other people. I'm sure they will find something else that they like.
I got to drive the pretty new white Prius all the way home and now all we need to do is name her.
*This from the daughter of the woman who would walk into car dealerships and announce to the salesperson "I don't know anything about cars"
Friday, September 9, 2011
The house saga
I had no appreciation of the drama required to buy a house before this move. I knew it was a Major Life Event, so I suppose I should have realized that drama would be part of the deal, but I went in blind.
Just finding a place we wanted to make an offer on was hard enough, and then when our first two offers didn't work out (overbid on one, they decided to take the house off the market for the second), I got that slightly hopeless feeling in my stomach and I began to have nightmares about having baby #2 in this horrible rental condo.
When our third offer was accepted we were cautiously optimistic. Maybe we'll get a house! We thought. But the story was far from over.
The home inspection revealed that the place needs a new roof immediately and the AC is at the end of its natural life, which means we could need to replace that soon as well.
These are not obstacles so much as opportunities for negotiation, we told ourselves. And after a lot of back and forth and a lot of stomach aches, we did get to resolution that allows us to go forward with the purchase, but oh! the drama.
I do appreciate the art of negotiation. But at a certain point, I want to stop playing the telephone game through two agents and get on the phone with this current owner guy and just get this deal done already.
As of today, the only thing remaining to check out is the appraisal and we should be getting that back in the next few days. Fingers crossed - we will close on Sept 21 and move in a week or two after (depending on the timing of a number of essential pre-move-in projects).
Just finding a place we wanted to make an offer on was hard enough, and then when our first two offers didn't work out (overbid on one, they decided to take the house off the market for the second), I got that slightly hopeless feeling in my stomach and I began to have nightmares about having baby #2 in this horrible rental condo.
When our third offer was accepted we were cautiously optimistic. Maybe we'll get a house! We thought. But the story was far from over.
The home inspection revealed that the place needs a new roof immediately and the AC is at the end of its natural life, which means we could need to replace that soon as well.
These are not obstacles so much as opportunities for negotiation, we told ourselves. And after a lot of back and forth and a lot of stomach aches, we did get to resolution that allows us to go forward with the purchase, but oh! the drama.
I do appreciate the art of negotiation. But at a certain point, I want to stop playing the telephone game through two agents and get on the phone with this current owner guy and just get this deal done already.
As of today, the only thing remaining to check out is the appraisal and we should be getting that back in the next few days. Fingers crossed - we will close on Sept 21 and move in a week or two after (depending on the timing of a number of essential pre-move-in projects).
Monday, September 5, 2011
Andrew comes to Tampa
Andrew arrived in Tampa on Wednesday evening and spent two nights visiting us here before we all trekked across the state for a fun long weekend with extended family.
With Andrew visiting, we had to order pizza on his first night in town. Eric and I hadn't really done our homework in the pizza department but we had driven by a place called Paci's many times and decided we would give it a try. I ordered one large cheese pizza and one large pepperoni.
My mother offered to do the pick-up (there's a weird absence of pizza delivery in Tampa. Too sprawling?) and returned carrying the two largest pizza boxes I have ever seen. Ever. Apparently a "large" for Paci's is 18" and even without calculating the area (it involves pi and squaring something) I can tell you that two of these is significantly more pizza than four people can or should eat outside of maybe those disgusting eating competitions that are always won by tiny Asian people.
Andrew stayed at the local HoJo while in town. He likes to have his own space and apparently enjoys sleeping past 5am, which can be hard to do in our small apartment here. The last time he stayed at a HoJo while visiting us was when he came to SF for our wedding almost two years ago. That HoJo had a special on perma-damp carpeting along one wall that we were thankful this local one didn't offer. Eric had recently learned that due to over-enrollment this year, the University of Tampa is using a HoJo as overflow space for freshmen: all but one floor is occupied by students.* I think Andrew was a little disappointed that he was not staying at HoJo Dorm, but just a regular HoJo with crabby management.
Thursday night we went to Miguel's, a Mexican restaurant we keep going to even though, as Eric said on the way home "I keep ordering different things trying to find something that's good." I think the margaritas help compensate, though I'll have to take their word for it.
Gail left for a wedding on Thursday night so Andrew had to look after Emerson while I did one work phone call on Friday. They had a great time kicking Emerson's various balls around inside and then Andrew took Emerson out to kick a ball around the parking lot. Emerson adored Andrew from the moment he arrived and was happy as a clam to get to spend so much time with him one of one. Andrew actually worked his charm all over the condo complex: after being here for about 36 hours he had made friends with several people walking their dogs and got free Girl Scout Cookies from an army guy from the local base. I guess we could learn a thing or two from him about how much we really need to be settled to be open to meeting people.
*I can see that being a bummer on the one hand (not being on campus, and it's a HoJo) but there are some nice perks as well (maid service! free cable TV! private bathroom!).
With Andrew visiting, we had to order pizza on his first night in town. Eric and I hadn't really done our homework in the pizza department but we had driven by a place called Paci's many times and decided we would give it a try. I ordered one large cheese pizza and one large pepperoni.
My mother offered to do the pick-up (there's a weird absence of pizza delivery in Tampa. Too sprawling?) and returned carrying the two largest pizza boxes I have ever seen. Ever. Apparently a "large" for Paci's is 18" and even without calculating the area (it involves pi and squaring something) I can tell you that two of these is significantly more pizza than four people can or should eat outside of maybe those disgusting eating competitions that are always won by tiny Asian people.
Andrew stayed at the local HoJo while in town. He likes to have his own space and apparently enjoys sleeping past 5am, which can be hard to do in our small apartment here. The last time he stayed at a HoJo while visiting us was when he came to SF for our wedding almost two years ago. That HoJo had a special on perma-damp carpeting along one wall that we were thankful this local one didn't offer. Eric had recently learned that due to over-enrollment this year, the University of Tampa is using a HoJo as overflow space for freshmen: all but one floor is occupied by students.* I think Andrew was a little disappointed that he was not staying at HoJo Dorm, but just a regular HoJo with crabby management.
Thursday night we went to Miguel's, a Mexican restaurant we keep going to even though, as Eric said on the way home "I keep ordering different things trying to find something that's good." I think the margaritas help compensate, though I'll have to take their word for it.
Gail left for a wedding on Thursday night so Andrew had to look after Emerson while I did one work phone call on Friday. They had a great time kicking Emerson's various balls around inside and then Andrew took Emerson out to kick a ball around the parking lot. Emerson adored Andrew from the moment he arrived and was happy as a clam to get to spend so much time with him one of one. Andrew actually worked his charm all over the condo complex: after being here for about 36 hours he had made friends with several people walking their dogs and got free Girl Scout Cookies from an army guy from the local base. I guess we could learn a thing or two from him about how much we really need to be settled to be open to meeting people.
*I can see that being a bummer on the one hand (not being on campus, and it's a HoJo) but there are some nice perks as well (maid service! free cable TV! private bathroom!).
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tired of nomadery
When I think about spending another month in limbo it makes me cry. I have to be honest: this past month has been really hard and I just don't know if I have another month of this in me. We are still living out of the suitcases we packed on July 30th and both Emerson and I are rapidly growing out of our clothing. Working from home, I spend more time than is good for me sitting at my laptop in this dim apartment and my time outdoors is usually spent walking around the parking lot with Emerson looking at the moon in the pre-dawn darkness rather than face the wildlife indoors.
The people I complain to say encouraging things like "one month will go by so quickly you'll hardly notice it," and while I want to believe them, this past month has been an eternity and it seems certain the next month will only be longer. Not knowing for sure which neighborhood we will be in has made us hesitant to start meeting people or get involved in local activities. For example, I took Emerson to try out a music class but am reluctant to sign up for the full session because if we end up in a different neighborhood it will be a long drive for no reason and all the moms and kids we would become friends with will live far away from us. So we will wait until we actually live somewhere.
Do you see how right I am to sit around feeling sorry for myself?
One bright spot: this weekend my brother Andrew will be joining us as we head out to New Smyrna Beach to hang out with a whole bunch of family, include Emerson's second cousin Lucy who is just a few years younger than he is. I think it is going to be a lot of fun.
The people I complain to say encouraging things like "one month will go by so quickly you'll hardly notice it," and while I want to believe them, this past month has been an eternity and it seems certain the next month will only be longer. Not knowing for sure which neighborhood we will be in has made us hesitant to start meeting people or get involved in local activities. For example, I took Emerson to try out a music class but am reluctant to sign up for the full session because if we end up in a different neighborhood it will be a long drive for no reason and all the moms and kids we would become friends with will live far away from us. So we will wait until we actually live somewhere.
Do you see how right I am to sit around feeling sorry for myself?
One bright spot: this weekend my brother Andrew will be joining us as we head out to New Smyrna Beach to hang out with a whole bunch of family, include Emerson's second cousin Lucy who is just a few years younger than he is. I think it is going to be a lot of fun.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Tropical living
Here we are, living in the tropics. This whole adventure still sometimes just feels like a really long, sometimes horrible, vacation and I think the palm trees, hot days and frequent thunderstorms contribute to the feeling that this is not really home. It may take a while to sink in that we are now tropical people.
While I shudder to put it in print, we now have experience with another aspect of tropical living: chihuahua-sized cockroaches. Living with us.
So far, I have only seen them between 5 and 6am when I am up with Emerson, and the same is true of Eric. I now refer to that as "Roach o'clock" or sometimes "The Cockroach Hour" which is funny to me because it sounds like a news show put on by cockroaches. I think the headlines would focus on pieces of food Emerson hides around the apartment and when someone forgets to run the garbage disposal before bed.
The funniest part about the cockroach encounters for me was how delighted Emerson was to see them. In his mind, these are just like the lizards he is fascinated by outdoors, but they run around on our kitchen counter and are as big as his hands. He loves them. They should clearly be welcomed, not shunned, and he got really agitated when I tried to trap one to put outside (ridiculous, I know, but I don't have the stomach to try to squish these things - waaaay too much crunching given how big they are).
Other than that this rental condo continues to be good enough for now. Sure, there are holes in the towels and the small bed Eric and I share is really more of a trampoline than a mattress: when he rolls over, I get three feet of air. But I just keep reminding myself that our bed will be here soon (probably). The home inspection of the place we have under contract is tomorrow, so I guess we will know more after that.
While I shudder to put it in print, we now have experience with another aspect of tropical living: chihuahua-sized cockroaches. Living with us.
So far, I have only seen them between 5 and 6am when I am up with Emerson, and the same is true of Eric. I now refer to that as "Roach o'clock" or sometimes "The Cockroach Hour" which is funny to me because it sounds like a news show put on by cockroaches. I think the headlines would focus on pieces of food Emerson hides around the apartment and when someone forgets to run the garbage disposal before bed.
The funniest part about the cockroach encounters for me was how delighted Emerson was to see them. In his mind, these are just like the lizards he is fascinated by outdoors, but they run around on our kitchen counter and are as big as his hands. He loves them. They should clearly be welcomed, not shunned, and he got really agitated when I tried to trap one to put outside (ridiculous, I know, but I don't have the stomach to try to squish these things - waaaay too much crunching given how big they are).
Other than that this rental condo continues to be good enough for now. Sure, there are holes in the towels and the small bed Eric and I share is really more of a trampoline than a mattress: when he rolls over, I get three feet of air. But I just keep reminding myself that our bed will be here soon (probably). The home inspection of the place we have under contract is tomorrow, so I guess we will know more after that.
Friday, August 19, 2011
Other major life event update: Groucho
I met with my Tampa midwife (and her two kids) this morning for our first visit. Given everything else that is going on right now it can be easy (for others) to forget that in addition to trying to buy a house, work full time, adjust to a brand new place and be an attentive and nurturing mother and wife, my body is in the process of growing another human being right now.
It was actually great that her kids came along because they entertained Emerson while Rebecca and I talked about how my pregnancy is going. The short answer: all is well, though I am pretty tired and wish I had more opportunity to exercise.
I spent a lot of my first pregnancy wondering what labor would be like. I know now (and remember pretty vividly) what labor #1 was like* and I especially like it when people tell me that labor #2 is usually faster (but not always). But mostly I just focus on having this second little guy around to hang out with - which I tried to think about the first time around but had so little idea what to actually expect that it was quite intangible. Now I know how much fun it is to get to know this little person as he learns, grows and explores. The idea of having two little boys around the house, no matter how messy it means that house will be, is very exciting. I can hardly wait to meet Groucho (and I am glad that we still have a few months to get ready for that big event.)
*I would gladly do the ice water exercise straight for a week to skip the pain of labor. (But I won't do the epidural. Aren't I fascinating and complex?)
It was actually great that her kids came along because they entertained Emerson while Rebecca and I talked about how my pregnancy is going. The short answer: all is well, though I am pretty tired and wish I had more opportunity to exercise.
I spent a lot of my first pregnancy wondering what labor would be like. I know now (and remember pretty vividly) what labor #1 was like* and I especially like it when people tell me that labor #2 is usually faster (but not always). But mostly I just focus on having this second little guy around to hang out with - which I tried to think about the first time around but had so little idea what to actually expect that it was quite intangible. Now I know how much fun it is to get to know this little person as he learns, grows and explores. The idea of having two little boys around the house, no matter how messy it means that house will be, is very exciting. I can hardly wait to meet Groucho (and I am glad that we still have a few months to get ready for that big event.)
*I would gladly do the ice water exercise straight for a week to skip the pain of labor. (But I won't do the epidural. Aren't I fascinating and complex?)
Thursday, August 18, 2011
No ego
The counter-offer on the offer we submitted on the cathouse was higher than we wanted it to be, but not by that much.
The dilemma: negotiate hard and risk the deal falling through or swallow our pride and accept the house at what is still an excellent price with excellent terms. I like to win. But I had to ask myself what "winning" really means at this point. If winning is about getting what you want at a good price, then we definitely won.
Just verbal agreement for now; we should have the fully executed contract tomorrow. Ahhhhhh!
I am not going to post the photos or address here because this is the Internet and that would be dumb but I will send them around via email so you can check it all out.
Oh my God. We may be homeowners soon. (So adult-sounding, no?)
The dilemma: negotiate hard and risk the deal falling through or swallow our pride and accept the house at what is still an excellent price with excellent terms. I like to win. But I had to ask myself what "winning" really means at this point. If winning is about getting what you want at a good price, then we definitely won.
Just verbal agreement for now; we should have the fully executed contract tomorrow. Ahhhhhh!
I am not going to post the photos or address here because this is the Internet and that would be dumb but I will send them around via email so you can check it all out.
Oh my God. We may be homeowners soon. (So adult-sounding, no?)
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Offer #3
I'm not sure I ever posted the outcome of offer #2: they decided to take their house off the market because the work transfer that had prompted the move had fallen through. Boooo!
After much deliberation, we decided to put in an offer on one of the houses we saw on Sunday. We refer to it as "the cathouse" because it is currently inhabited by two cats (in addition to the owners). This was how we came to distinguish it from the ten other places we saw; they blur together really quickly. (Other places were: the jungle house, the bad carpeting house, the busy street house, etc.)
The emotional process of buying a house is actually pretty complex: you need to get attached enough to a place that you are willing to put in an offer, but you can't get too attached because it may or may not work out and you don't want to get too invested and pay more for it than you really mean to.
We'll see. As we know, anything can happen.
After much deliberation, we decided to put in an offer on one of the houses we saw on Sunday. We refer to it as "the cathouse" because it is currently inhabited by two cats (in addition to the owners). This was how we came to distinguish it from the ten other places we saw; they blur together really quickly. (Other places were: the jungle house, the bad carpeting house, the busy street house, etc.)
The emotional process of buying a house is actually pretty complex: you need to get attached enough to a place that you are willing to put in an offer, but you can't get too attached because it may or may not work out and you don't want to get too invested and pay more for it than you really mean to.
We'll see. As we know, anything can happen.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Trip within a trip
It is a bad sign that the St Louis Westin is the place in the world where I feel most at home right now.
It's nice to be home, even if only for a night.
It's nice to be home, even if only for a night.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Back to Tampa
Our two weeks at the beach came to an end today. We packed everything up into Roy, climbed in and drove up to "move in" to our temporary furnished rental which we will stay in month to month until we either find a house to buy or give up looking and get a long-term rental.
Our temporary furnished rental is a two bedroom ground floor condo in a condo complex called Grand Key. It is on a major street and across the street from a Lowe's, among other large stores. It has some nice perks like a shared pool and a small fitness center. The condo itself is exactly what you would expect from a temporary furnished rental: I would rate it a medium on a scale of grim-ness.*
It is good that the "master" bedroom has an enormous closet because that can be Emerson's room while my mother stays with us to help out for a while. It turns out that the day before she came down here for a week-long visit she was informed that she had lost her job. Eric and I were sure to say how sorry we were before eagerly asking if she might be willing to stay with us and look after Emerson while I finish up this project for work. She agreed, so she gets the second bedroom. Sometimes things do seem to just work out.
After moving all of our stuff into the condo, we went out for another marathon day of house-hunting. We saw 11 places all in a new part of town called Westchase. We have seen everything there is to see in South Tampa within our price range it is all garbage. We have seen good places come on the market in our price range so we know it isn't impossible but it seems like it will take a while and I am not sure we have that kind of endurance at this point. Westchase is a little further out and it is subdivision-land, but it has great schools and we will be able to get more space for our money. Eric says he is willing to do the extra driving. This does mean we would need to get a second car.
Of the 11 we saw, a few places have potential. We're going to sleep on it and see what clarity we have. I go to St Louis in the morning for a few days so maybe that will bring extra perspective as well.
*Not a scale of grim to great, but a scale of really grim to not too grim.
Our temporary furnished rental is a two bedroom ground floor condo in a condo complex called Grand Key. It is on a major street and across the street from a Lowe's, among other large stores. It has some nice perks like a shared pool and a small fitness center. The condo itself is exactly what you would expect from a temporary furnished rental: I would rate it a medium on a scale of grim-ness.*
It is good that the "master" bedroom has an enormous closet because that can be Emerson's room while my mother stays with us to help out for a while. It turns out that the day before she came down here for a week-long visit she was informed that she had lost her job. Eric and I were sure to say how sorry we were before eagerly asking if she might be willing to stay with us and look after Emerson while I finish up this project for work. She agreed, so she gets the second bedroom. Sometimes things do seem to just work out.
After moving all of our stuff into the condo, we went out for another marathon day of house-hunting. We saw 11 places all in a new part of town called Westchase. We have seen everything there is to see in South Tampa within our price range it is all garbage. We have seen good places come on the market in our price range so we know it isn't impossible but it seems like it will take a while and I am not sure we have that kind of endurance at this point. Westchase is a little further out and it is subdivision-land, but it has great schools and we will be able to get more space for our money. Eric says he is willing to do the extra driving. This does mean we would need to get a second car.
Of the 11 we saw, a few places have potential. We're going to sleep on it and see what clarity we have. I go to St Louis in the morning for a few days so maybe that will bring extra perspective as well.
*Not a scale of grim to great, but a scale of really grim to not too grim.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Birthday!
Today I turned 33.
It was a tropical birthday this year and when I got done with my work I was able to take Emerson for a swim before dinner. He has just loved being outside and being in the water as much as possible while we have had this idyllic beach-front set-up. It has been lucky, as well, because he has had the bad luck of having an extremely painful mouth infection while also getting some new teeth and we are putting on a 24 hour three ring circus to keep him distracted from the pain. Today was the worst day yet in terms of his level of misery. Poor guy. The water does seem to help.
My mother, who will be staying with us until the end of September, made spinach cheese pie to celebrate (it is the traditional birthday meal of my childhood) and we also had cake and ice cream.
Tomorrow I get a massage.
Eric commented that this was the mellowist birthday celebration I have had since he has known me. It's true: I tend to love to do it up on my birthday in a big way. But this year celebrating with family, good food, a good night's sleep and the promise of a massage was pretty much exactly what I needed.
Well, and a house. But we'll get that part figured out soon.
It was a tropical birthday this year and when I got done with my work I was able to take Emerson for a swim before dinner. He has just loved being outside and being in the water as much as possible while we have had this idyllic beach-front set-up. It has been lucky, as well, because he has had the bad luck of having an extremely painful mouth infection while also getting some new teeth and we are putting on a 24 hour three ring circus to keep him distracted from the pain. Today was the worst day yet in terms of his level of misery. Poor guy. The water does seem to help.
My mother, who will be staying with us until the end of September, made spinach cheese pie to celebrate (it is the traditional birthday meal of my childhood) and we also had cake and ice cream.
Tomorrow I get a massage.
Eric commented that this was the mellowist birthday celebration I have had since he has known me. It's true: I tend to love to do it up on my birthday in a big way. But this year celebrating with family, good food, a good night's sleep and the promise of a massage was pretty much exactly what I needed.
Well, and a house. But we'll get that part figured out soon.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Who invited the homeless lady
To say that I am not 100% on top of my game right now would be…true. Let me share an example.
During the pre-move chaos I packed a handful of work-acceptable maternity clothes into my next-two-months suitcase (everything else went to storage where it will be until we are successful in buying a house or we give up trying) but they are ill-fitting and don’t really go so well together. So for my Chicago work trip, knowing that I would be among extremely fashion-conscious women, I opted for the least bad combo: black pants that could fit two of me, a light blue knit top that isn’t quite long enough and a light grey jacket that I can’t button over my belly. Add to that that something about the Florida water has turned my hair to greasy straw. Also, I realized the morning of the meeting about 10 minutes before the bus was leaving that I haven’t plucked my eyebrows in about a month and I didn’t have any tweezers with me. And my shoes may be a little too well-worn.
On the bus ride to the meeting, my Luna bar flaked a little chocolate coating onto my blue shirt right in the middle of my belly. I tried to dab it off but it turned into a big brown spot. Remember: jacket doesn’t button. Instead, it calls attention to the big stain by framing it just so.
I pretend that all is well and I take my active role in leading this meeting, trying not to notice how sharp everyone else looks.
Several hours into the meeting, during the morning break, I go to the bathroom and notice that the prominent silver necklace and earrings that I am wearing – accessories! my one bright spot! – clash horribly with the large black and gold buttons on the grey jacket.
I am happy to say that in spite of all of this, the meeting went extremely well and we got to a very exciting outcome.
I am also now accepting suggestions for professional make-over packages in the Tampa area.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Thank you Dollar Rent-a-Car man
I used my trip to the airport to return the rental car that we no longer need now that Roy is back with us.
An older gentleman checked in the car and gave me my receipt. Then he asked me if he could tell me something. I said OK.
"You look very beautiful this morning," he told me.
I am sure he says that to everyone but I choose to believe that he meant it with me.
An older gentleman checked in the car and gave me my receipt. Then he asked me if he could tell me something. I said OK.
"You look very beautiful this morning," he told me.
I am sure he says that to everyone but I choose to believe that he meant it with me.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Going away
I head to Chicago tomorrow morning and won't be back in home sweet Florida until very late Wednesday night. I have been nervous about this trip because I don't want to freak Emerson out by disappearing for such a long time. He is more sensitive than usual to my whereabouts these days, understandably, and he still doesn't quite understand when I explain to him that I will be back soon. He will be in good hands with his dad and his Gama while I am gone, so I know I don't really need to worry, but I probably still will.
Sunday, August 7, 2011
Our car is not stolen
Against all the odds, Roy arrived tonight.
Eric got the call around 5:30pm from the pair who have been transporting him across the country saying that they were about 3 hours away. He got another call at 10pm saying they were just up the street. We went out to meet them.
I was excited to see the huge car carrier trailer, but I was actually even more excited to see that they had left it a mile away at a shopping center, unloaded Roy and another car, and drove just the cars to the little condo driveway on a narrow road with a number of very tight turns.
The young-ish hispanic woman jumped out of Roy and the older black man hopped out of the other car and you would have thought they just got off of a theme park roller coaster: they were giddy and both talking a mile a minute. It seems they have had quite an adventure coming to Florida.
"I had 18 blow-outs on this trip," the guy told me.*
"We got stuck in this little town in New Mexico. It didn't even have a Wal-mart!" explained the lady.
"I got one guy, he's got a silver Chrysler 300**, and he threatened to call the police on me!" shared the guy.
"Wow," Eric said. "Some people!***"
They gave us $50 off for being a week late.
Eric pulled Roy into a parking spot and observed that he smelled different than when we last saw him almost two weeks ago.
"He's been sleeping with someone else," he commented sadly.
It's good to have him back!
*I had to go back up to get the cash from the condo so I missed the story, but Eric explained to me later that it had been the same wheel that blew out 18 times because there was something wrong with how it was attached. I'm not sure if this is more or less likely than every single wheel blowing out on the 18 wheel trailer.
**It was definitely silver. Not sure about the rest of it, though.
***We thought about calling the police but never actually picked up a phone to do it.
Eric got the call around 5:30pm from the pair who have been transporting him across the country saying that they were about 3 hours away. He got another call at 10pm saying they were just up the street. We went out to meet them.
I was excited to see the huge car carrier trailer, but I was actually even more excited to see that they had left it a mile away at a shopping center, unloaded Roy and another car, and drove just the cars to the little condo driveway on a narrow road with a number of very tight turns.
The young-ish hispanic woman jumped out of Roy and the older black man hopped out of the other car and you would have thought they just got off of a theme park roller coaster: they were giddy and both talking a mile a minute. It seems they have had quite an adventure coming to Florida.
"I had 18 blow-outs on this trip," the guy told me.*
"We got stuck in this little town in New Mexico. It didn't even have a Wal-mart!" explained the lady.
"I got one guy, he's got a silver Chrysler 300**, and he threatened to call the police on me!" shared the guy.
"Wow," Eric said. "Some people!***"
They gave us $50 off for being a week late.
Eric pulled Roy into a parking spot and observed that he smelled different than when we last saw him almost two weeks ago.
"He's been sleeping with someone else," he commented sadly.
It's good to have him back!
*I had to go back up to get the cash from the condo so I missed the story, but Eric explained to me later that it had been the same wheel that blew out 18 times because there was something wrong with how it was attached. I'm not sure if this is more or less likely than every single wheel blowing out on the 18 wheel trailer.
**It was definitely silver. Not sure about the rest of it, though.
***We thought about calling the police but never actually picked up a phone to do it.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Observations from inside the Florida housing market
If I had to explain the Florida residential housing market to a "non real estate" person I would say that it is like a party with a lot of men and a small number of homely women.*
Here's what that adds up to: a lot of dumpy, poorly dressed, awkwardly built or just plain ugly women are walking around looking for someone to talk to, dance with, just stand near - anything! And they are getting no attention whatsoever.
Then a moderately pretty woman arrives at the party and while this woman is really, truly nothing special, she suddenly has men elbowing each other out the way to buy her a drink. She ends up with multiple drinks and will definitely go home with someone above her true attractiveness level.
If a truly lovely woman were to arrive at the party, she would probably be mauled and torn limb from limb by over-desperate admirers.
It is starting to feel like we might be leaving this party without a date.
*Some would describe this as "business school."
Here's what that adds up to: a lot of dumpy, poorly dressed, awkwardly built or just plain ugly women are walking around looking for someone to talk to, dance with, just stand near - anything! And they are getting no attention whatsoever.
Then a moderately pretty woman arrives at the party and while this woman is really, truly nothing special, she suddenly has men elbowing each other out the way to buy her a drink. She ends up with multiple drinks and will definitely go home with someone above her true attractiveness level.
If a truly lovely woman were to arrive at the party, she would probably be mauled and torn limb from limb by over-desperate admirers.
It is starting to feel like we might be leaving this party without a date.
*Some would describe this as "business school."
Friday, August 5, 2011
Friday night showdown
Now that my mother is here with us in Florida, Eric and I have had the chance to get out in the evenings, which feels like quite a luxury.
Tonight we explored the Friday night scene on Anna Maria Island. We wandered down the city pier watching way more people that I would have expected fishing and even catching things. We got an ice cream cone at "Two Scoops," an average ice creameria. We watched this sunset:
Then the real fun began. And by real fun, I mean mini-golf.
The mini-golf course we stumbled upon was fish-themed (each hole was named after a Florida fish) and its most distinctive feature was the mist machines behind hard-blowing fans which created a moist, hurricane-like environment in the tightly arranged holes. Every time I took a breath the word "biofilm" echoed through my head, and occasionally Eric would comment on which mist machines likely had the highest concentration of legionella. (This is what you get when you marry a microbiologist.)
We jockeyed back and forth for the lead the first nine. Starting the back nine I fell a few strokes behind and got worried. So I changed the rules: each hole required a different physical challenge, and we would alternate choosing the challenge.
First one (12th hole) was standing only on your left leg. Pretty tame. Second one was one-handed.
Third one: behind the back. Eric ended up shooting from behind the back through his legs and did pretty well in spite of a giggling fit right before his second shot.
Fourth one: holding the putter between your knees with you hands above your head ("roller coaster arms"). We had an audience for this one and while they were a little skeptical of my practice swings, they changed their tune after I knocked the ball cleanly down the green toward the hole with a satisfying click. Eric had a solid knee knock as well but the audience wasn't quite as impressed, maybe because he wasn't wearing a skirt.
Fifth one: billiards style. Down on your knees and elbows using the putter like a pool cue. I was the one with the giggling problem on this hole.
Sixth one: blind. Face away from the hole, close eyes, then turn around, place your ball and take your best shot. Do not open those eyes just yet! Your partner leads you with your eyes closed to your ball and places your hand on the ball, then the hole. I sunk it in 2 strokes total. Eric needed 4. This was where things really started to change for me.
18th hole: using the heel of the putter only. This hole had a stream running through the middle of it and required a soft touch that was simply not possible with the heel. Even better, there were three very old men sitting in rocking chairs watching us play the 18th hole. I have no idea what they were doing there. I can only imagine how silly they thought we were, hitting the balls with the wrong side of the club and landing them in the drink again and again and again (5 times for me, 7 for Eric). We did, finally, manage to get the balls into the hole, and my victory was sealed.
Then Eric won the "plinko" to get a free game. So I guess in the end it was kind of a tie.
Tonight we explored the Friday night scene on Anna Maria Island. We wandered down the city pier watching way more people that I would have expected fishing and even catching things. We got an ice cream cone at "Two Scoops," an average ice creameria. We watched this sunset:
Then the real fun began. And by real fun, I mean mini-golf.
The mini-golf course we stumbled upon was fish-themed (each hole was named after a Florida fish) and its most distinctive feature was the mist machines behind hard-blowing fans which created a moist, hurricane-like environment in the tightly arranged holes. Every time I took a breath the word "biofilm" echoed through my head, and occasionally Eric would comment on which mist machines likely had the highest concentration of legionella. (This is what you get when you marry a microbiologist.)
We jockeyed back and forth for the lead the first nine. Starting the back nine I fell a few strokes behind and got worried. So I changed the rules: each hole required a different physical challenge, and we would alternate choosing the challenge.
First one (12th hole) was standing only on your left leg. Pretty tame. Second one was one-handed.
Third one: behind the back. Eric ended up shooting from behind the back through his legs and did pretty well in spite of a giggling fit right before his second shot.
Fourth one: holding the putter between your knees with you hands above your head ("roller coaster arms"). We had an audience for this one and while they were a little skeptical of my practice swings, they changed their tune after I knocked the ball cleanly down the green toward the hole with a satisfying click. Eric had a solid knee knock as well but the audience wasn't quite as impressed, maybe because he wasn't wearing a skirt.
Fifth one: billiards style. Down on your knees and elbows using the putter like a pool cue. I was the one with the giggling problem on this hole.
Sixth one: blind. Face away from the hole, close eyes, then turn around, place your ball and take your best shot. Do not open those eyes just yet! Your partner leads you with your eyes closed to your ball and places your hand on the ball, then the hole. I sunk it in 2 strokes total. Eric needed 4. This was where things really started to change for me.
18th hole: using the heel of the putter only. This hole had a stream running through the middle of it and required a soft touch that was simply not possible with the heel. Even better, there were three very old men sitting in rocking chairs watching us play the 18th hole. I have no idea what they were doing there. I can only imagine how silly they thought we were, hitting the balls with the wrong side of the club and landing them in the drink again and again and again (5 times for me, 7 for Eric). We did, finally, manage to get the balls into the hole, and my victory was sealed.
Then Eric won the "plinko" to get a free game. So I guess in the end it was kind of a tie.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
At the beach
I like it here.
Emerson had a great time playing in the pool and the Gulf today; he made happy, excited noises pretty much constantly all day except when he got the occasional taste of Gulf water and then he scrunched up his face and stuck his tongue way out. But mostly, he had a ball.
I got my work done and still had time to go for a swim with Eric and Emerson and a short walk along the beach. Eric saw a ray with a white under-side jump out of the water, or so he says. I saw a big splash but it could have been a small meteorite or something, you never know.
It is H-O-T here but I am enjoying it. I have made the unreasonable demand that the air conditioning at the condo be set to 85 degrees and so far Eric is going along with it. He might just think it is funny to see me working on my laptop in my bathing suit all day. I think it is very pleasant and will help us acclimatize well to our steamy new home state.
My mother arrives late tomorrow evening. Eric and I are looking forward to seeing her and spending time together here (and having the chance to leave the condo together after 6pm).
Emerson had a great time playing in the pool and the Gulf today; he made happy, excited noises pretty much constantly all day except when he got the occasional taste of Gulf water and then he scrunched up his face and stuck his tongue way out. But mostly, he had a ball.
I got my work done and still had time to go for a swim with Eric and Emerson and a short walk along the beach. Eric saw a ray with a white under-side jump out of the water, or so he says. I saw a big splash but it could have been a small meteorite or something, you never know.
It is H-O-T here but I am enjoying it. I have made the unreasonable demand that the air conditioning at the condo be set to 85 degrees and so far Eric is going along with it. He might just think it is funny to see me working on my laptop in my bathing suit all day. I think it is very pleasant and will help us acclimatize well to our steamy new home state.
My mother arrives late tomorrow evening. Eric and I are looking forward to seeing her and spending time together here (and having the chance to leave the condo together after 6pm).
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Day 2
Today we secured that hotel-ish short-term furnished apartment. I made the lease guy sit in the car with me to review and sign the papers because Emerson had fallen asleep in the car on the drive to meet him. Eric, meanwhile, was picking up his new work computer and scoping out his new office. He reported that the computer is "gorgeous" (goes without saying: it's a Mac) and that his office overlooks a dome.
The other big development of the day is that we put in an offer on our favorite house from yesterday. We went back to see the house again today and it was still great so we decided to give it a whirl. This new realtor is a crafty negotiator and during our second walk-through today she was already laying some groundwork for our offer. ("I was looking up comps and couldn't find anything in this area to support your list price. Could you send me some of the comps that you used to come up with this price?" to which the reply was "We know the house is currently overpriced...") So we put together an offer at the realtor's office while Emerson ran around and the realtor sent it over. Let's see what happens! We should hear something back by end of day Thursday. I feel like we should buy a lotto ticket too just to see.
It continues to be about 98 degrees during the day, and it has become clear that Emerson has my complexion: he and I both get quite flushed in this heat. Eric has taken to calling us his "pinks," as in "Just sitting here eating lunch with my pinks," which he said today at Crazy Ray's Deli.
After all this action, we hot-footed it to the beach! Some friends who have a condo on Anna Maria Island are letting us stay there for the price of the air conditioning (thank you!!). We arrived around 6pm after getting groceries on the way. It feels great to be in a relaxing spot, though I am actually back at work tomorrow so it won't really be a vacation, even though I hope it feels like one, at least some of the time.
The other big development of the day is that we put in an offer on our favorite house from yesterday. We went back to see the house again today and it was still great so we decided to give it a whirl. This new realtor is a crafty negotiator and during our second walk-through today she was already laying some groundwork for our offer. ("I was looking up comps and couldn't find anything in this area to support your list price. Could you send me some of the comps that you used to come up with this price?" to which the reply was "We know the house is currently overpriced...") So we put together an offer at the realtor's office while Emerson ran around and the realtor sent it over. Let's see what happens! We should hear something back by end of day Thursday. I feel like we should buy a lotto ticket too just to see.
It continues to be about 98 degrees during the day, and it has become clear that Emerson has my complexion: he and I both get quite flushed in this heat. Eric has taken to calling us his "pinks," as in "Just sitting here eating lunch with my pinks," which he said today at Crazy Ray's Deli.
After all this action, we hot-footed it to the beach! Some friends who have a condo on Anna Maria Island are letting us stay there for the price of the air conditioning (thank you!!). We arrived around 6pm after getting groceries on the way. It feels great to be in a relaxing spot, though I am actually back at work tomorrow so it won't really be a vacation, even though I hope it feels like one, at least some of the time.
Monday, August 1, 2011
All of it is happening
I am proud to say I went to the gym this morning. It is a particularly easy thing to do when all it requires is a short elevator ride, plus I am reading Bossypants on my kindle and it was really just an excuse to go read.
When I got back to the room Eric had called Joe, the guy who loaded Roy onto his big car-carrying truck almost a week ago.
"I'm not gonna make it," Joe told Eric by phone this morning.
"Wha-what?" Eric responded.*
"Air bag blew out on me. I'm in New Mexico waiting on replacement parts. I'll let you know when I expect to be getting to Florida."
And that was that. Our car may or may not actually be stolen. If it was, at least we have a video of it happening.
From there, we went to tour some day care centers in Tampa that we are thinking about sending Emerson to until I wrap up at work in the next few months. None of them were bad, they were just so day care-y. I'm sure a 1:6 teacher to 18 month old ratio makes sense when one is regulating this sort of thing, but I don't think I am quite ready for Emerson to be competing for affection and attention with five other children for most of his waking life starting in two weeks. I know there would be good things for him in a program like this and one option could be to do a half-day program so he can have some fun with the other little ones every day, but also still get cuddled plenty at home.
Then we did some house-hunting. We spent a few hours with a new realtor** looking at eight places up for sale. Unexpectedly, we feel a lot less pressure now to find something good than I think we did when we were here before. Which is good, because most of these places were not so great. However, one of them was great and a couple of others were potentially good runners-up. We are thinking about making an offer on the one we liked which is pretty exciting and, in a sign that either I have more fully accepted our move to Tampa or my crazy pregnancy hormones have stabilized somewhat, doesn't make me want to sob uncontrollably.
We also looked at two rentals - one short-term furnished joint that reminded me of the Sheraton in Key West (in case we want to buy), and an unfurnished place which I would suggest to a location scout is perfect for a miniseries about a tropical flop-house (in case we strike out).
I need to get to bed soon but there were a few other highlights from the day as well:
*I don't know for sure how this part of the conversation went because I was at the gym, but I suspect I am pretty close.
**The woman we worked with back in May was a nitwit. This new woman is a lot better.
When I got back to the room Eric had called Joe, the guy who loaded Roy onto his big car-carrying truck almost a week ago.
"I'm not gonna make it," Joe told Eric by phone this morning.
"Wha-what?" Eric responded.*
"Air bag blew out on me. I'm in New Mexico waiting on replacement parts. I'll let you know when I expect to be getting to Florida."
And that was that. Our car may or may not actually be stolen. If it was, at least we have a video of it happening.
From there, we went to tour some day care centers in Tampa that we are thinking about sending Emerson to until I wrap up at work in the next few months. None of them were bad, they were just so day care-y. I'm sure a 1:6 teacher to 18 month old ratio makes sense when one is regulating this sort of thing, but I don't think I am quite ready for Emerson to be competing for affection and attention with five other children for most of his waking life starting in two weeks. I know there would be good things for him in a program like this and one option could be to do a half-day program so he can have some fun with the other little ones every day, but also still get cuddled plenty at home.
Then we did some house-hunting. We spent a few hours with a new realtor** looking at eight places up for sale. Unexpectedly, we feel a lot less pressure now to find something good than I think we did when we were here before. Which is good, because most of these places were not so great. However, one of them was great and a couple of others were potentially good runners-up. We are thinking about making an offer on the one we liked which is pretty exciting and, in a sign that either I have more fully accepted our move to Tampa or my crazy pregnancy hormones have stabilized somewhat, doesn't make me want to sob uncontrollably.
We also looked at two rentals - one short-term furnished joint that reminded me of the Sheraton in Key West (in case we want to buy), and an unfurnished place which I would suggest to a location scout is perfect for a miniseries about a tropical flop-house (in case we strike out).
I need to get to bed soon but there were a few other highlights from the day as well:
- As we were driving away from the hotel this morning, having driven in this rental SUV for approximately 10 miles coming in from the airport last night, Eric said, "Wow, we've already gone through half a gas tank." I was halfway through saying "Are you happy with your choice?" when I realized what a funny joke he was making. In my defense, I was really hungry.
- The highlight of Emerson's day was clear: we stopped at Publix to get a few supplies and they have these special carts for kids where the kid faces away from you and there's a little steering wheel for them to "drive" the cart as you push it around. The only time I have seen him happier is poking at Sarah and Rob's poor, tolerant cats.
- We also took him to a park for a little while from 3:30 to 4:30 in the afternoon. It was an adorable park in a family-oriented neighborhood and we were the only people there the whole time. Where was everyone? It might have been the thunderheads and the occasional actual thunder but it wasn't actually raining and in fact the air was noticeably cooler for a little while there.
- We went back to the Mexican restaurant where we ate our first Tampa meal ever last time we were here and it was as delicious and salty and greasy as we remembered it. Emerson, who eats no added salt in his food, gulped water after every bite I gave him.
- We needed to get some milk for Emerson on the way home from dinner because the milk we had been driving around in the hot car all day had lost its appeal. Eric's idea: the Krispy Kreme drive through, because apparently they sell milk. ("They have to!" Eric explained to me.) And of course, you can't go through the drive through just for milk, so we got one hot freshly made donut which, I will admit, was incredible. I was one with Homer Simpson for about 15 minutes there.
*I don't know for sure how this part of the conversation went because I was at the gym, but I suspect I am pretty close.
**The woman we worked with back in May was a nitwit. This new woman is a lot better.
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